Sunday 5 July 2015

Buddy Parenting - A Positive Trend

When my parents grew up, they were reared with a threatening cane which would come down sharply on their knuckles if they misbehaved. Fortunately, that trend has changed. When I was growing up, my parents ensured that I learned to behave well not out of fear but out of understanding. I am no longer a kid and am old enough to have my own now. I am now treated as an adult and my opinions are valued at home. I was wondering how people bring up their kids these days. So, I decided to carefully observe my cousin and my little nephew of six.

My sister in law is an angel of a woman and I strongly believe that only luck won my cousin such a gem of a wife. She is an even better mother! I spent quite a few weeks in their spacious home in Ahmedabad, and observed how my little nephew was being treated like a young mind and not just a cuddly baby.

Large rooms can help your kids play and stay happier!

As a toddler, my nephew learned to brush his teeth before eating anything in the morning as my sis in law would make that look more attractive than tearing open a bag of chips. Every time my nephew wet his pants, he would start crying out of fear and guilt. But my smart sis in law, would give him a perplexed stare and ask him what the big deal was. She would ask him to change his pants as she wiped the floor clean. My cousin learned to deal with guilt in this way. His fear of trying out new things was quashed as my sis in law would make him accompany her to the grocery store. The little kiddo learned how to pick his favourite biscuits and carton of Chocos from the aisles of the supermarkets. He learned how to assert his individuality in his own little way.

If your kids hate walking, buy them a mini-scooter!

On my latest trip abroad to Moscow, I saw how happy the tiny tots looked. Most of them did not have to be carried or dragged on prams. They wore skates, used skate boards or scooters to keep up their pace with their parents. I even saw some cool parents take to scooters so they could commute the way their kids did.

Our children can teach us wonderful ways to enjoying the little things in life. We must not be instructive or authoritarian in our style of parenting. It is much better to be a friend to your little bundle of joy. Try buddy-parenting and immerse  yourself in the 'Khushi Ke Pal' as you emulate the philosophy of 'Khuljaye Bachpan'!

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